Sept. 19, 2021

Loving yourself fully with Anita Moorjani

Loving yourself fully with Anita Moorjani
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Loving yourself fully with Anita Moorjani
Loving yourself fully with Anita Moorjani
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Season 6 Personal Growth & Healing

In this episode, Cass talks with Anita Moorjani, a speaker and NYT bestselling author who recovered from cancer after experiencing a Near Death Experience (NDE) in February 2006. Anita shares the message she received during her NDE about the importance of letting go of fear and being willing to embrace and express your authentic nature in order to live fully. Connect with Anita:www.anitamoorjani.comInstagram.com/anitamoorjaniFacebook.com/anita.moorjani
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Transcript
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A listener production.

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This is Crappita Happy and I am your host, Cas Done.

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I'm a clinical and coaching psychologist and mindfulness meditation teacher

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and of course author of the Crappita Happy books. In

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this show, I bring you conversations with interesting, inspiring, intelligent

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people who are experts in their field and who have

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something of value to share that will help you feel

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less crappy and more happy. Recently, we have been talking

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a lot on this show about the power of self

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compassion and hopefully learning to be a bit kinder to ourselves.

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Today's guest also has a powerful message of self acceptance

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and of learning to embrace who you truly are, but

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she shares it from a rather unique perspective. Anita Moor

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Johnny was diagnosed with lymphoma at the age of forty

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two after a lifetime of what she describes as living

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to please others and being afraid to truly express herself.

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After a four year battle with cancer, in February of

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two thousand and six, Anita slipped into a coma as

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her organs began shutting down. Now I will let you

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listen to her account of what happened when she crossed

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over to the other side, the decision that she made

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to return to her sick body, how she miraculously healed,

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and the renewed sense of purpose that she has discovered

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since that near death experience. Anita went on to write

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a book about her experiences called Dying to Be Me,

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which became a New York Times bestseller, and has written

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two subsequent best selling books, one called What If This

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Is Heaven and her most recent is called Sensitive Is

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the News Strong? Now listen. I know some of you,

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like me, will find Anita's story utterly fascinating, and some

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of you will be deeply skeptical. So I hope that

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if you do listen, that you listen with an open mind,

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and you take from her story the messages and the

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lessons that resonate with you personally. Without further ado, here

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is my conversation with Anita more Johnny, Anita, it is

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such a pleasure to have you on the Crappy to

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Happy Podcast.

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Welcome, thank you, and thanks so much for inviting me

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to be here. It's a pleasure to be here.

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I'm a fan.

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I read, like probably like many millions of people, I

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read your first book, Dying to Be Me. Back in

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it's almost ten years ago, isn't it? Since that it is?

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Hey man, it is it's nine and a half years.

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March of twenty twenty two will be the tenth year

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anniversary and we're relaunching it for the year anniversary.

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Yeah, oh, this is good timing. Then this is yes.

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And then just before we get into the to the interview,

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I did also then have the pleasure of seeing you

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when you came to Australia twenty fifteen or twenty sixteen

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with Wayne Dyer.

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Yeah, it must have been twenty fifteen, because he passed

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away in August of twenty fifteen.

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So I remember feeling to it so that I was

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so grateful that I'd had the opportunity to see him,

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because he did pass away shortly shortly after. So, Anita,

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I obviously know who you are and I know what

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your story is for the listeners. Are you able to

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just share what that experience was that you had that

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led you to writing the book Dying to Be Me?

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Sure? So, I was diagnosed with lymphoma in two thousand

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and two. At that time, I was diagnosed with stage

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two lymphoma. I had a lump on my neck and

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apparently so that was it was biopsied and it turned

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out to be lymphoma. When they did scans, they found

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it had spread down into my breast and my chest area,

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so it was staged at stage two. Over a period

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of four years, it continued to progress as I experimented

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with different ways of trying to heal it. At first

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I didn't want to do the conventional. Much later I

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finally agreed to do conventional, you know, the chemotherapy and all.

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But by that point the doctors told me it was

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far too late. I'd left it too long. But over

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the period of four years, basically it had progressed. The

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lymphoma the cancer had progressed, So lymphoma is cancer of

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the lymph plants, so it had progressed to the point

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where in February of two thousand and six, four years

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after diagnosis, I had tumors, some of them the size

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of golf balls, all over my lymphatic system, from the

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base of my skull back here, all around my neck,

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under my arms, in my chest, and all the way

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down to my abdomen. My body had stopped absorbing nutrition,

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so I weighed about eighty five pounds. My lungs were

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filled with fluid because my body had stopped absorbing nutrition.

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My muscles had completely deteriorated, and I couldn't even hold

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up my own body weight, so I couldn't even stand up.

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I was so weak. I couldn't stand up, I couldn't walk.

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But because my lungs were filled with fluid, when I

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would lie down, if I lay flat, I would choke

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on my own fluid. So I was constantly, you know,

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I had to be propped up. I couldn't sleep. I

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was in so much pain and so much discomfort that

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on February the first, two thousand and six, I basically

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gave up. I had been fighting to stay alive, but

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at that point it felt harder to stay alive than

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to just let go, and so I let go, and

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I went into a coma. I basically died. The doctors

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at that point told my family that I was now

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in a coma and I was going through the dying process,

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and that I wasn't coming back, that I was not

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even to come out of the coma. They said I

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wasn't going to make it through the night, and they

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said my organs were now shutting down. Apparently my kidneys

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had already shut down, and they said my organs were

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shutting down one by one, and so my family were distraught,

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and they were around me in the hospital and knew

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that I was now dying. But unbeknownst to everyone around me,

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my soul or my essence had left my body. My

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physical body was in the coma, but I had left

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my body, and I felt incredible, like I felt free.

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I was no longer feeling any more pain or discomfort

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or fear because I had feared the cancer, I had

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feared the treatment, I had feared death, I feared everything.

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So but now I was out of my body. I

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just felt so free and light and liberated, and I

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felt as so I was just enveloped in a feeling

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of just unconditional love. It was just the most incredible

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feeling ever. It's hard to even describe it. But I

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was aware of everything that was going on here in

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the physical even though I was no longer in my body,

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and I could see everything that was happening around my

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physical body. I could see my physical body lying on

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the hospital bed, but my body looked so small and

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insignificant compared to how I was now feeling. And I

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could hear everything the doctors were saying, not just in

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the room that my body was in, but even beyond

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the room. I could hear things that were being said

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outside down the hallway in the nurses station. I could

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see the doctors telling my husband that these were my

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final hours and I wasn't going to make it through

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the night. And as I continued in that realm, in

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that form, in that non physical form, I felt as

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though I was expanding more and more, but also going

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deeper into that state where I started to sense other entities,

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other beings surround me, and they were people I knew

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from before, and they were helping me through this process.

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Like my dad was there, my dad who had passed

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away ten years prior, he was there, My best friend

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who had died two years prior, she was there. And

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then there were also other entities who I didn't recognize

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from this lifetime, but all I felt from all of

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them was pure unconditional love. And I experienced a lot

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of different things, like time is not linear there, So

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I just learned a lot while I was there. I

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understood why I was sick, why I had the cancer.

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I understood how it was that every choice and decision

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that I had made during my life here had led

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to that point of me lying there on that hospital bed, dying,

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and I reached a point where I felt I was

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given a choice as to whether to come back or not.

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And no part of me wanted to come back because

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my body was sick and dying, and I'd been suffering.

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My family was suffering looking after me, so no part

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of me wanted to come back. But my dad said

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to me that you haven't completed your purpose yet, that

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you need to go back, that you still have things

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to do that are not yet done. But again, I

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didn't want to come back because my body was sick.

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But it was in that moment that I started to

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really understand. I started to understand what my purpose was

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and who I was, and I started to underst stand

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why it was that I had got sick. You know,

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it was because I had never allowed myself to be

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who I am. I'd always I'd always made myself small

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so others could feel big. I'd always lived in fear.

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And it was at that point that my dad said

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to me, now you know the truth, then if you

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choose to go back, your body will heal very very quickly.

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And so it was at that point that I made

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the decision to come back. My dad wanted me to

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know that my purpose was linked to my husband's purpose

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and he would not be able to fulfill his purpose

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if I didn't go back, And so I made the

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choice to come back. And I had been in the

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coma for just thirty six hours, like for a day

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and a half. And when as soon as I started

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to open my eyes, my family were really really shot.

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I was able to tell them conversations that they'd had

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with the doctor and things like that, and within four days,

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my tumor is shrank by about sixty or seventy percent.

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Within three weeks, the doctors were having trouble finding the

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cancer in my body, and within five weeks they let

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me go home to live my life cancer free. And

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that was in March of two thousand and six.

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It is such an incredible story. Honestly, it just gives

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me shivers to hear it.

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Also, I just want to say for anybody who has

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lost somebody, I think there's so much comfort in you

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sharing that story, that experience. You know that the amount

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of love that is available, you know when you cross

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over to that other side. Anita, how did that experience

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change how you live your life.

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Oh, it changed it dramatically. And and what you just

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said also is really important. It's important for us to

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know that our loved ones are fine on the other side,

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and they are loved, and it's those that they've left behind.

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It's the people here that need to heal their heart.

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And the way this experience changed me, It's changed the

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way I view life and the way I view our

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physical body and healing and all kinds of things because

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what I learned, like, first of all, I watched my

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own body heal just within days from going from death

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to completely full recovery, where I was up on my

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feet and walking, and it took me a few weeks

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to gain the strength in my muscles again. But that's

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exactly it. It took weeks, not months, not years, but weeks,

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and I was out and I was walking. I'd lost

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all my hair to the cancer treatment, so but my

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hair was coming back, and within a couple of months

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to look at me, no one would even know that

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I was, that I had been on my deathbed, And

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so it changed how I view our bodies. I realized,

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first of all, that our bodies are incredibly powerful and strong,

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and I realized that the most powerful driving force behind

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our bodies is our essence or our soul, or our

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spirit or our consciousness, whatever it is that you want

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to call it. Because from the moment that my soul

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understood that I had a purpose and I was not

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meant to cross over, it was not my time, and

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that I had a purpose, and that I had not

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realized that I'm supposed to be who I am. It

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was the moment that my soul understood that and made

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the choice that yes, I'm going to live. I'm going

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to come back in this body. My body became fine,

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and it made me realize that the way we approach

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our physical lives, our physical bodies and life in general,

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we have what I call an outside in approach, where

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we think that the physical is real, that if the

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body gets sick, we have tohal it from the physical,

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not even heal it, but we have to medicate the physical,

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and all the focuses on the physical. Even when we

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go to alternative practitioners, they may give you herbal remedies

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and all that, but it's still focused on the physical.

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They're still trying to get rid of the diagnosis of

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the cancer or whatever the diagnosis is, I realize the

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most important element is your spirit, your soul. Why is

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it here? What is my purpose? Do I have passion

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in life? Do I feel I belong? Do I allow

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myself to express myself? Or have I been playing small

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and hiding myself? Or do I still have unres of trauma?

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You know, all these things to uncover and set our

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souls free is the most important thing. That's what I realized,

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and that is how I live my life today.

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And in answer to all of those questions, for most

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people you know that I talk to, and we talk

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about it on this podcast, people are so disconnected from

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their purpose. They don't live their life authentically.

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They're people pleasing.

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And saying yes when they mean no and trying to

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be all things to all people. How is it that

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we become so disconnected from our true nature or our

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essence or purpose?

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So I believe that, so, speaking for myself, we actually

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give ourselves up trying to fit in. In other words,

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it becomes more important to us to be liked by

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other people than to follow our own heart. And it

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starts with just it's just ignorance. It's nobody's fault. It's

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so easy for us to blame our parents. You know,

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everybody says, oh, yeah, I'm traumatized because of my parents.

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And of course there are people who are who have

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been abused, and so I'm not undermining that, but I

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think that everybody goes through the experience, even if you

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have good parents, that when you're young, your parents want

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you to fit in. Your schools want you to fit in. Everybody,

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even today, our governments, you know, want us to comply,

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and school systems want us to fit in. And it's

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just the way it is. And even even things like

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when you have something physically, like if you're physically unwell,

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if you're taken to the doctor, every time you're unwell,

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00:16:54.000 --> 00:16:56.120
with a sore throat, with a cough, with a cold,

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the message that you are receiving every time you're taken

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to the the message you're receiving is that my body

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doesn't have the capacity to heal. I need external intervention.

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So it's always outside intervention. What I'm being told from

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the outside is more important than what I have the

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capacity to do from the inside. So being the message

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you're getting is my body doesn't have the capacity to heal.

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When your parents want you to be obedient and listen

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to them and be quiet and so on. We are

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our brains, our little brains interpret it as that, oh

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I am wrong, I am bad. I need to change

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and be somebody different. And for us as a little person,

283
00:17:44.759 --> 00:17:47.319
as a child, we do it as a form of

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00:17:47.359 --> 00:17:53.119
survival because our love, our roof, over our heads, our food,

285
00:17:53.319 --> 00:17:57.440
and everything. Our survival depends on winning the approval of

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our parents. So of course we want them to be happy.

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And children are sensitive and they can sense when their

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parents are unhappy with them. So we do anything to

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gain their approval and their love, and in doing so,

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we lose ourselves. And so it's not the parent's fault

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because we're doing to our kids what was done to us.

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But if parents become aware of this, then parents can

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actually encourage their kids to be who they are and

294
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still continue to discipline them with a different language, you know,

295
00:18:34.319 --> 00:18:37.000
just a different language saying oh, it would be better

296
00:18:37.039 --> 00:18:39.799
for you to do this, but I still love you regardless.

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So our language and our culture and our paradigm doesn't

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actually support people being who they are. It's something that

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we just need to be aware of and start to

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change slowly.

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Yeah, I recently had Martha Beck on the podcast and

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we talked about you know Martha obviously and yes, her

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00:19:02.400 --> 00:19:06.839
recent book, Too Is discusses a lot this nature versus

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00:19:06.880 --> 00:19:10.559
culture kind of dichotomy or this you know, this tension

305
00:19:10.599 --> 00:19:13.839
that exists, and your message is very similar obviously.

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You know, it's just working our way.

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Back to that true nature and shedding what's being kind

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of heaped on us by by culture, which is so much.

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It's it's a lot, and so it's not even just

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our parents. But let's say you happen to be very

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blessed and you have these great parents that want you

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to express yourself. What ends up happening is chances are

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when you go to school, you end up maybe not

314
00:19:42.839 --> 00:19:46.359
fitting in in school because you're so used to being

315
00:19:46.400 --> 00:19:49.119
in tune with your inner self and your intuition and

316
00:19:49.200 --> 00:19:51.680
all of this, and then you find that, oh my gosh,

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00:19:51.920 --> 00:19:53.920
I don't fit in. The other kids are not like that.

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00:19:54.200 --> 00:19:58.640
So it is a very very what I call it's

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a very strong cultural field that we live in. And

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because what I often tell people is that in reality

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and truth, we are born as multisensory beings. We have

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at least six or more senses. What that means is

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that we are from the time we're born. We're very intuitive.

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Sometimes kids can see things, we intuit things, we know things.

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But all these things are then suppressed in order to

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fit into the school system and fit into the world,

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which is really unfortunate because for many of us, those

328
00:20:38.000 --> 00:20:43.440
other senses are actually extremely powerful, strong, and loud. For us,

329
00:20:43.680 --> 00:20:47.039
they're as strong as the five senses that we have

330
00:20:47.160 --> 00:20:50.279
come to accept and take for granted, the five senses

331
00:20:50.319 --> 00:20:57.839
of site, smell, hearing, touch, taste, exactly. But this cultural

332
00:20:57.920 --> 00:21:01.839
field where it is very percise and strong, it's very

333
00:21:01.880 --> 00:21:07.000
persistent and strong in convincing everyone that anything outside of

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00:21:07.039 --> 00:21:12.359
those five senses is not real. It's woo woo, it's unprovable,

335
00:21:12.440 --> 00:21:16.440
and so on. And because we've cut off any sense

336
00:21:16.519 --> 00:21:21.799
beyond the five senses, for people whose other senses are

337
00:21:21.960 --> 00:21:26.759
equally or stronger, if not stronger, than those five accepted senses,

338
00:21:27.359 --> 00:21:30.480
it becomes very hard to navigate life. They feel they

339
00:21:30.519 --> 00:21:34.839
don't fit in, They struggle, and sometimes they even get sick.

340
00:21:35.440 --> 00:21:39.519
And so for a lot of people, their physical illness

341
00:21:39.880 --> 00:21:44.279
are a manifestation of making themselves small. So what I

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00:21:44.440 --> 00:21:47.559
mean when you make yourself small is that you cut

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off certain senses that you have because it's unaccepted, it's unacceptable,

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and you don't fit in because of that because our

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world doesn't, our paradigm culture field doesn't recognize that part

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00:22:02.079 --> 00:22:05.039
of you. It denies it. You're forced to deny that

347
00:22:05.079 --> 00:22:06.400
part of you to fit in.

348
00:22:08.160 --> 00:22:11.599
It is interesting, isn't it, Because we have all had

349
00:22:11.640 --> 00:22:14.960
experiences of times of having a gut feeling about something

350
00:22:15.079 --> 00:22:16.599
or having a hunch about something.

351
00:22:16.680 --> 00:22:18.960
But you start talking about.

352
00:22:18.759 --> 00:22:21.359
Really connecting with an intuitive or a sixth sense, and

353
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then people think, oh, well, that's way too out there

354
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for me. But again that's our conditioning, isn't it. Like

355
00:22:27.839 --> 00:22:30.000
we all have access I would say some more than

356
00:22:30.039 --> 00:22:33.559
others are more strongly attuned to it, but we all

357
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have that capacity to access this kind of intuitive start

358
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of us intuitive knowing.

359
00:22:43.200 --> 00:22:48.319
Yeah, we all do. And it's fine, Like it's great

360
00:22:48.359 --> 00:22:51.720
if you're navigating the world really well and you've never

361
00:22:51.880 --> 00:22:55.160
needed to access it. But one of the things that

362
00:22:55.359 --> 00:23:00.200
I realized, like during like one of the things my

363
00:23:00.279 --> 00:23:05.519
near death experience taught me was that I do think

364
00:23:05.640 --> 00:23:10.480
differently from other people and had suppressed who I really

365
00:23:10.519 --> 00:23:15.200
am just to try and fit in. I had always been.

366
00:23:15.400 --> 00:23:18.799
I'd always been a people pleaser my entire life. And

367
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what I never knew was that my own thoughts, my

368
00:23:25.240 --> 00:23:30.960
own feelings actually matter, that I actually matter. I didn't

369
00:23:31.000 --> 00:23:37.039
know that. So I also wasn't aware that, let's say, say,

370
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other people don't think like me. So, for example, what

371
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made me a people pleaser? I didn't realize that when

372
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somebody was struggling or when someone was suffering, that I

373
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could actually feel what they were feeling, and so I

374
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would jump in and rescue them. And I was just

375
00:23:53.519 --> 00:23:57.960
a natural rescuer. And I'm wondering, Cass, do you find

376
00:23:58.000 --> 00:24:01.000
yourself jumping in and constantly rescue doing people as well?

377
00:24:03.359 --> 00:24:08.039
I've been wondering about this myself, Anita, Possibly, yes, yes

378
00:24:08.079 --> 00:24:08.279
I can.

379
00:24:08.359 --> 00:24:09.119
Could I do that?

380
00:24:10.079 --> 00:24:13.160
Because when I would talk to people like more recently

381
00:24:13.200 --> 00:24:15.400
and they would say, yeah, I find I'd do that too.

382
00:24:15.880 --> 00:24:20.640
So basically what I found what I realized. One of

383
00:24:20.680 --> 00:24:24.279
the things I realized after the near death experience is

384
00:24:24.319 --> 00:24:29.640
that prior to me getting sick, I would always believe

385
00:24:29.759 --> 00:24:34.680
that everybody else's needs were more important than mine. I

386
00:24:34.720 --> 00:24:39.160
would always believe that everybody else's problems were more important

387
00:24:39.160 --> 00:24:43.839
than mine, and so I was always out helping people.

388
00:24:43.920 --> 00:24:46.839
So whenever people called on me to help them, I

389
00:24:47.000 --> 00:24:49.200
was there. I would feel, that's what it means to

390
00:24:49.240 --> 00:24:51.920
be a good friend, which it is, which is great,

391
00:24:52.160 --> 00:24:55.880
it's noble to do that. But when I had my

392
00:24:56.000 --> 00:25:00.240
own problems, I would never call on them because I

393
00:25:00.319 --> 00:25:03.480
didn't want to bother them. I felt that, oh no,

394
00:25:03.640 --> 00:25:06.319
I don't want to be a bother. So even when

395
00:25:06.359 --> 00:25:09.799
I was sick, even when I got canceled, it was

396
00:25:09.839 --> 00:25:12.599
like my body was trying to give me these wake

397
00:25:12.680 --> 00:25:15.599
up calls. My body was trying to say first in

398
00:25:15.680 --> 00:25:20.079
little ways, my body would manifest little illnesses and would say,

399
00:25:20.640 --> 00:25:23.960
it's time to take care of yourself. Stop wearing yourself down,

400
00:25:24.119 --> 00:25:28.079
stop tiring yourself, Stop being there for everybody except yourself.

401
00:25:28.559 --> 00:25:31.039
But I would ignore it because as soon as someone

402
00:25:31.079 --> 00:25:33.680
needed me, I was there, and I would say, that's

403
00:25:33.680 --> 00:25:36.000
what it means to be a good friend, that's what

404
00:25:36.000 --> 00:25:39.799
it means to be a good person. So the wake

405
00:25:39.880 --> 00:25:43.079
up calls would get bigger and bigger, and I would

406
00:25:43.119 --> 00:25:46.640
still ignore them, to the point when even I could

407
00:25:46.680 --> 00:25:49.920
not be there for anyone because I had to take

408
00:25:49.960 --> 00:25:53.400
care of myself, because I was so weak, I still

409
00:25:53.440 --> 00:25:57.119
would not call on other people to help me because

410
00:25:57.160 --> 00:25:59.480
I didn't want to bother them. I would feel, oh, no,

411
00:25:59.599 --> 00:26:02.079
they have issues of their own. Even though I had

412
00:26:02.119 --> 00:26:05.599
been there for them a thousand times, I would still

413
00:26:05.640 --> 00:26:07.839
feel and because I had been there for them a

414
00:26:07.920 --> 00:26:11.200
thousand times, I would feel, oh, they've got so many problems.

415
00:26:11.240 --> 00:26:13.839
I don't want to bother them with mine. And so

416
00:26:14.079 --> 00:26:17.200
even when I was really sick and people would come

417
00:26:17.279 --> 00:26:21.960
and help me, I would feel really uncomfortable with their help,

418
00:26:22.039 --> 00:26:25.400
and I would think, oh, I don't want to burden them,

419
00:26:25.960 --> 00:26:29.960
and I would still look after them. While they were

420
00:26:30.039 --> 00:26:33.079
there looking after me, I would feel like, oh, I

421
00:26:33.119 --> 00:26:35.599
don't want to burden them, and I would let them

422
00:26:35.720 --> 00:26:39.480
go quickly and then still try and do what I

423
00:26:39.519 --> 00:26:43.839
could do. And it was not the illness. It was

424
00:26:43.960 --> 00:26:49.200
not cancer, not even end stage cancer, stage four cancer

425
00:26:49.519 --> 00:26:53.279
that healed me from my propensity of being such a

426
00:26:53.319 --> 00:26:58.519
people pleaser and doormat. It was death that taught me that,

427
00:26:58.880 --> 00:27:02.279
oh my god, it's I need to take care of myself.

428
00:27:02.480 --> 00:27:06.279
Oh my gosh. That it was death that taught me

429
00:27:06.359 --> 00:27:09.559
that I matter, I need to take care of myself,

430
00:27:09.920 --> 00:27:13.960
which is why I share what I share. I want

431
00:27:14.000 --> 00:27:17.279
people to know that you don't need to get to

432
00:27:17.359 --> 00:27:21.039
the point of death to learn this. You really don't.

433
00:27:21.720 --> 00:27:25.039
Oh, I know so many people will be listening to

434
00:27:25.119 --> 00:27:29.839
this who can relate to that. Putting everybody else's needs

435
00:27:29.880 --> 00:27:32.519
ahead of their own, putting themselves always at the bottom

436
00:27:32.519 --> 00:27:36.359
of the list, even when they're sick, even when they're injured,

437
00:27:36.680 --> 00:27:40.200
got a broken leg. You know, it's still hopping around.

438
00:27:41.079 --> 00:27:45.400
It's trying to be all things to all people. And

439
00:27:45.440 --> 00:27:47.839
you're right, like, I mean, we don't want to get

440
00:27:47.880 --> 00:27:51.200
to our deathbed to have to learn that lesson.

441
00:27:52.359 --> 00:27:57.359
We don't exactly. And so this is where I've realized

442
00:27:57.440 --> 00:28:01.920
that a lot of people really, really really struggle with

443
00:28:02.119 --> 00:28:05.839
saying no. They really struggle with that, And so most

444
00:28:05.920 --> 00:28:08.839
of the work I do today, My first book, Dying

445
00:28:08.880 --> 00:28:11.799
to Be Me, was really about that experience that I

446
00:28:11.839 --> 00:28:14.200
spoke about and what I learned on the other side.

447
00:28:14.640 --> 00:28:18.920
But every subsequent book I've written is really to help

448
00:28:19.000 --> 00:28:22.960
people who are struggling with saying no, who are still

449
00:28:23.000 --> 00:28:27.160
struggling because they're putting everybody else first, who still feel

450
00:28:27.200 --> 00:28:29.880
that it's selfish and they just don't have the tools

451
00:28:30.279 --> 00:28:34.160
to take care of themselves and put themselves first. So

452
00:28:34.319 --> 00:28:38.079
that's really what I've kind of made it my mission

453
00:28:38.160 --> 00:28:41.640
for people to know how important it is for them

454
00:28:41.680 --> 00:28:46.599
to realize. It's so important for each person to realize

455
00:28:46.880 --> 00:28:50.319
that you matter. Your soul came here for a purpose,

456
00:28:50.799 --> 00:28:54.720
and if you're constantly being a doormat and trying to

457
00:28:54.759 --> 00:28:57.920
fit in and being a people pleaser, your soul never

458
00:28:58.000 --> 00:29:01.599
gets this opportunity to go and be all that it

459
00:29:01.640 --> 00:29:02.319
came here to be.

460
00:29:04.079 --> 00:29:09.720
I hope that you're enjoying this conversation and realizing the

461
00:29:09.759 --> 00:29:12.640
benefits of positivity in your own life. If you are

462
00:29:12.759 --> 00:29:15.480
enjoying the show, please be sure to like and subscribe

463
00:29:15.519 --> 00:29:17.839
so that you get notified when you epps drop and

464
00:29:17.920 --> 00:29:20.359
head on over to Apple Podcasts or wherever you listen

465
00:29:20.440 --> 00:29:29.839
and leave us a rating and review. Anita, you are

466
00:29:29.880 --> 00:29:35.160
obviously a very spiritual person, but I not In your

467
00:29:35.359 --> 00:29:38.319
most recent book, which I've been really loving, Sensitive is

468
00:29:38.359 --> 00:29:41.839
the new strong that you talk about. Even in your

469
00:29:41.920 --> 00:29:49.599
spiritual life before your near death experience, you were striving

470
00:29:49.640 --> 00:29:52.480
to be the right kind of spiritual, and I really

471
00:29:52.519 --> 00:29:54.839
wanted you to talk about that if you could, because

472
00:29:54.920 --> 00:29:58.559
I think I know people who could relate to this.

473
00:29:58.880 --> 00:30:01.319
Can you share about how, even in your spirituality you

474
00:30:01.359 --> 00:30:03.359
were kind of trying to be good at it?

475
00:30:04.359 --> 00:30:10.799
Yes, So I was always trying really hard to be

476
00:30:10.960 --> 00:30:14.359
a spiritual person, and I thought that, Oh, I need

477
00:30:14.359 --> 00:30:16.759
to do this. I need to meditate more, I need

478
00:30:16.799 --> 00:30:20.400
to pray more. I need to go and adopt more

479
00:30:20.440 --> 00:30:23.759
spiritual practices, I need to do more charity work. And

480
00:30:23.839 --> 00:30:27.920
everything I was doing was with the view of being

481
00:30:27.960 --> 00:30:31.440
more spiritual so that one day when I cross over,

482
00:30:31.880 --> 00:30:34.880
I would have a good afterlife that I would not,

483
00:30:35.839 --> 00:30:38.839
you know, have a negative afterlife, or have a bad

484
00:30:38.960 --> 00:30:43.680
life review, or have bad karma, or come back in

485
00:30:43.759 --> 00:30:47.039
another life with bad you know, in a life that's

486
00:30:47.559 --> 00:30:51.119
where I suffer. So everything I did was to ensure

487
00:30:51.200 --> 00:30:53.680
I had a good afterlife and to create good karma

488
00:30:53.720 --> 00:30:57.960
and to be really spiritual. When I died, I realized,

489
00:30:58.200 --> 00:31:01.559
oh my god, I have been living half a life

490
00:31:01.599 --> 00:31:05.279
because I've been so worried about the afterlife and the

491
00:31:05.519 --> 00:31:10.039
message that I had been sending myself by thinking that

492
00:31:10.160 --> 00:31:13.680
I had to keep working at being more spiritual. The

493
00:31:13.839 --> 00:31:17.559
message I'm sending my own spirit is that you are

494
00:31:17.599 --> 00:31:20.400
not good enough the way you are. You need to

495
00:31:20.640 --> 00:31:24.400
work hard at being a better person, at being more spiritual.

496
00:31:24.799 --> 00:31:29.720
When in actuality, your soul, your spirit comes into this

497
00:31:29.839 --> 00:31:34.039
world as a pure soul, as a beautiful, pure soul.

498
00:31:34.160 --> 00:31:37.599
It is a facet of God, and you have to

499
00:31:37.680 --> 00:31:41.400
allow it to shine and be who it is. And

500
00:31:41.480 --> 00:31:44.200
basically we just have to allow our spirit to shine

501
00:31:44.240 --> 00:31:47.559
and be who it is. And now I realize that

502
00:31:48.039 --> 00:31:53.000
being yourself means allowing your spirit to shine through you.

503
00:31:53.559 --> 00:31:58.839
That's what being authentic is. It's following your purpose, realizing

504
00:31:58.880 --> 00:32:01.799
that you are a spiritual being, that you don't have

505
00:32:01.880 --> 00:32:05.880
to work hard at being spiritual. You are spirit In

506
00:32:05.920 --> 00:32:10.400
other words, being yourself and being spiritual are one and

507
00:32:10.480 --> 00:32:15.000
the same thing. And you know, people sometimes say to me,

508
00:32:15.400 --> 00:32:18.559
but what about people who commit crimes and so on?

509
00:32:18.680 --> 00:32:23.200
And I say, they're not being themselves. They have lost

510
00:32:23.279 --> 00:32:27.359
their way. The point is, it's about being who you

511
00:32:27.480 --> 00:32:30.480
are and about being who your spirit came here to be.

512
00:32:30.960 --> 00:32:34.680
Your spirit did not enter this world saying I'm going

513
00:32:34.759 --> 00:32:37.160
to go rob banks or kill people or do this

514
00:32:37.400 --> 00:32:40.480
or do that. It did not come in saying that

515
00:32:40.640 --> 00:32:44.039
it came in. It came in full of love, saying

516
00:32:44.559 --> 00:32:47.240
I want to express myself and be all that I

517
00:32:47.279 --> 00:32:51.960
can be. That's what being spiritual is. And somehow, through

518
00:32:52.119 --> 00:32:56.200
trauma or whatever that happened to them, they lost their way.

519
00:32:56.880 --> 00:33:02.799
So really it's about finding yourself self, being yourself, being authentic,

520
00:33:03.240 --> 00:33:04.839
that's what being spiritual is.

521
00:33:05.279 --> 00:33:08.440
So, you know, even if somebody doesn't relate to the

522
00:33:08.640 --> 00:33:10.680
meditating and the praying, I think there are people who

523
00:33:10.680 --> 00:33:13.279
can relate to this whole striving and doing. As you

524
00:33:13.319 --> 00:33:15.200
said before, like being a good friend means I have

525
00:33:15.240 --> 00:33:17.559
to put everybody else's needs ahead of my own, and

526
00:33:17.599 --> 00:33:19.480
to be a better person and to be a better parent.

527
00:33:19.519 --> 00:33:23.200
There's all of this doing and striving and self sacrificing

528
00:33:23.799 --> 00:33:29.160
and losing touch with the fact that our own needs

529
00:33:29.240 --> 00:33:33.880
and our own desires and our own you know, preferences, opinions,

530
00:33:33.920 --> 00:33:36.519
everything is just as important.

531
00:33:37.200 --> 00:33:39.400
Yes, And I will really want to add one more

532
00:33:39.480 --> 00:33:43.240
thing here. That a common thing that people tell me

533
00:33:43.720 --> 00:33:46.559
very often all the time. A person will say, but

534
00:33:46.759 --> 00:33:49.359
I'm a parent of two children or three children. It's

535
00:33:49.400 --> 00:33:53.640
all very well you saying this. You don't understand you

536
00:33:53.680 --> 00:33:56.440
don't have children. So here's the thing that I have

537
00:33:56.519 --> 00:33:58.759
to say to you. If you're a parent, how did

538
00:33:58.839 --> 00:34:02.839
I become a people pleaser. I learned from my own parent,

539
00:34:02.920 --> 00:34:06.759
my own mother. We learn from who our parents are,

540
00:34:07.039 --> 00:34:10.519
not what they say. If you are being a people pleaser,

541
00:34:10.639 --> 00:34:14.920
sacrificing your life for your children, that is what they're

542
00:34:14.960 --> 00:34:18.920
going to learn to do. If you teach them and

543
00:34:19.079 --> 00:34:22.639
show them that it is important to honor your soul

544
00:34:23.119 --> 00:34:26.360
and be who you are and take time off for yourself,

545
00:34:26.719 --> 00:34:30.760
and then when you're with them, you are refreshed and

546
00:34:30.800 --> 00:34:33.480
your energy is big, and you're full of love and

547
00:34:33.519 --> 00:34:37.519
not frustrated and tired. Your children will learn the importance

548
00:34:37.559 --> 00:34:40.599
of doing that for their children. So that's what I

549
00:34:40.639 --> 00:34:42.360
would like to say. Yes.

550
00:34:43.960 --> 00:34:47.599
And in your most recent book, Sensitive is the New Strong,

551
00:34:47.800 --> 00:34:52.320
you have made the distinction between somebody who is intuitive

552
00:34:52.320 --> 00:34:54.320
and somebody who is an EmPATH. And I really want

553
00:34:54.360 --> 00:34:55.920
to talk to you about this because I hear the

554
00:34:55.920 --> 00:34:59.800
word EmPATH being used around the place. Oh, I'm such

555
00:34:59.800 --> 00:35:02.719
an EmPATH And I've always thought, what is that just mean?

556
00:35:02.840 --> 00:35:07.199
I'm really considerate and caring and compassionate towards other people.

557
00:35:07.880 --> 00:35:11.360
What is your definition of what it really means to

558
00:35:11.360 --> 00:35:12.039
be an EmPATH?

559
00:35:12.840 --> 00:35:17.400
Okay, so people can be compassionate and caring even if

560
00:35:17.440 --> 00:35:21.559
they're not an EmPATH. People have different levels of sensitivity.

561
00:35:22.039 --> 00:35:26.159
Some people are less sensitive to their surroundings and the

562
00:35:26.199 --> 00:35:29.320
people in their surroundings, you know. And when I say that,

563
00:35:29.440 --> 00:35:32.440
it means that you're less bothered by who is in

564
00:35:32.480 --> 00:35:36.000
your area. You're less bothered by crowds, you're less bothered

565
00:35:36.000 --> 00:35:39.760
by noise. So some people are less sensitive to their

566
00:35:39.840 --> 00:35:44.239
surroundings and other people are more sensitive to their surroundings.

567
00:35:44.599 --> 00:35:49.320
The more sensitive to your surroundings, what that means is

568
00:35:49.360 --> 00:35:53.159
that when there are people and animals in your surroundings,

569
00:35:53.679 --> 00:35:58.440
you can actually intuit or feel what they're feeling. And

570
00:35:58.559 --> 00:36:02.480
that's what makes you more sensitive. So, you know, people

571
00:36:02.519 --> 00:36:06.159
who don't like being in crowds, the reason they don't

572
00:36:06.239 --> 00:36:09.199
like being in crowds is because the energies of the

573
00:36:09.199 --> 00:36:12.320
people around them bother them. Because they can feel it.

574
00:36:12.400 --> 00:36:15.760
They can feel it, or they know when somebody is

575
00:36:15.880 --> 00:36:20.320
depressed or disturbed or somebody or if somebody has negative intentions.

576
00:36:20.320 --> 00:36:23.840
So the more sensitive someone is, the more they are

577
00:36:23.880 --> 00:36:27.679
affected by their surroundings or the more they can sense

578
00:36:27.840 --> 00:36:32.480
their surroundings. Also, you have sensitive people who can sense

579
00:36:33.000 --> 00:36:36.400
the needs of animals and they are very good with animals,

580
00:36:36.719 --> 00:36:38.880
or they can sense the needs of people who are

581
00:36:38.960 --> 00:36:41.760
needy and sick, and so they're very good around them.

582
00:36:42.239 --> 00:36:44.960
So now when you go take it up a notch

583
00:36:45.360 --> 00:36:49.719
to empaths, the difference between an EmPATH and a highly

584
00:36:49.800 --> 00:36:55.800
sensitive person is that an EmPATH actually absorbs the energies

585
00:36:55.920 --> 00:36:58.960
around them. So it's not just that they can sense

586
00:36:59.000 --> 00:37:03.519
them and know what people are feeling, but their energy

587
00:37:03.840 --> 00:37:08.639
literally melds with the energy of the people around them,

588
00:37:09.360 --> 00:37:12.880
and if they're not aware of it, they take on

589
00:37:13.440 --> 00:37:16.320
someone else's energy and they can leave the room and

590
00:37:16.400 --> 00:37:21.360
leave the space feeling depressed and not understand why. So

591
00:37:22.039 --> 00:37:25.280
when they are an aware EmPATH and they understand what

592
00:37:25.320 --> 00:37:29.039
their energy is doing, they can leave the room saying, ah,

593
00:37:29.599 --> 00:37:32.440
you know, if they feel depressed or anxious, they can

594
00:37:32.519 --> 00:37:36.360
leave the room and go, oh, okay, I'm feeling anxiety.

595
00:37:37.039 --> 00:37:40.239
I didn't do anything to cause me anxiety. I must

596
00:37:40.320 --> 00:37:43.440
have picked it up from other people. And then they

597
00:37:43.519 --> 00:37:47.239
work to actually letting it go. So the difference between

598
00:37:47.239 --> 00:37:50.079
an aware EmPATH and an unaware EmPATH is that an

599
00:37:50.199 --> 00:37:53.360
unaware one will pick up all the energies of other

600
00:37:53.400 --> 00:37:56.760
people and act on them as if it's their own.

601
00:37:56.840 --> 00:37:58.960
They'll act out they'll be like, oh my god, I'm

602
00:37:59.000 --> 00:38:02.400
feeling anxious. Oh feeling depressed, and then they'll take it

603
00:38:02.440 --> 00:38:04.800
on as if it's their own and then start to

604
00:38:04.880 --> 00:38:08.239
work towards like, oh, I need to release anxiety. I

605
00:38:08.280 --> 00:38:10.639
need to release depression. What trauma have I gone through?

606
00:38:10.679 --> 00:38:13.639
But no, what you need to do is realize it's

607
00:38:13.679 --> 00:38:17.920
not yours and just do a few things to release

608
00:38:18.000 --> 00:38:22.079
it because it's not yours. So that's my definition of

609
00:38:22.079 --> 00:38:26.000
an EmPATH. An EmPATH is not only sensitive to the

610
00:38:26.159 --> 00:38:30.360
energies around them, but they actually absorb them into their

611
00:38:30.400 --> 00:38:31.440
own energy field.

612
00:38:33.199 --> 00:38:37.400
So that's really interesting, isn't it, Because how would somebody

613
00:38:37.599 --> 00:38:40.400
necessarily know, Like somebody might be listening to this now

614
00:38:40.400 --> 00:38:43.360
and going, oh, well, I'm anxious all the time. Maybe

615
00:38:43.360 --> 00:38:45.719
it's not me, but maybe it's them.

616
00:38:46.320 --> 00:38:49.920
So how does somebody, So.

617
00:38:51.000 --> 00:38:56.000
Do you discern it by knowing that? For example? And

618
00:38:56.119 --> 00:38:59.039
if you are so, here's the one thing I have,

619
00:38:59.840 --> 00:39:02.960
the vised a quiz, which is free. It's on my website,

620
00:39:03.400 --> 00:39:06.760
so that people can discern whether they're an EmPATH or not.

621
00:39:07.079 --> 00:39:12.440
And there's thirty four questions. And the couple of people

622
00:39:12.679 --> 00:39:16.079
who really put this term out there in the public,

623
00:39:16.119 --> 00:39:19.239
who brought people's awareness to being an EmPATH is doctor

624
00:39:19.320 --> 00:39:23.880
Judith Orlov and doctor Elaine Aaron, and so even if

625
00:39:23.920 --> 00:39:27.559
you were to look online, there are quizzes that determine

626
00:39:27.559 --> 00:39:31.239
whether you're an EmPATH or not. But when you describe,

627
00:39:31.599 --> 00:39:34.800
like say, for example, when I just described it, if

628
00:39:34.800 --> 00:39:38.239
a person is an EmPATH and they heard me describing it,

629
00:39:38.719 --> 00:39:42.440
they would immediately go, yes, I am, because they would

630
00:39:42.639 --> 00:39:47.119
know that when they walk into a room, whether their

631
00:39:47.159 --> 00:39:51.480
mood or their energy level changes right away. They when

632
00:39:51.519 --> 00:39:55.880
you're an EmPATH, if no one's ever described it to you,

633
00:39:55.880 --> 00:39:59.079
you don't know what's going on. You don't know why

634
00:39:59.119 --> 00:40:02.199
you go through the these mood energy shifts, why you

635
00:40:02.239 --> 00:40:05.599
get depleted so easily, why you can get high so easily,

636
00:40:05.880 --> 00:40:08.679
why it is that everything in your life can be

637
00:40:08.760 --> 00:40:13.920
going totally fine, but then you just feel really blah.

638
00:40:13.960 --> 00:40:16.760
And it could be because of the energies around you.

639
00:40:16.760 --> 00:40:19.079
You know, all the people right now are anxious because

640
00:40:19.079 --> 00:40:22.320
of lockdown and so on, and you could just be

641
00:40:22.400 --> 00:40:26.440
picking up on their energies. And it's things like if

642
00:40:26.480 --> 00:40:30.159
you have trouble watching the news, if every time you

643
00:40:30.280 --> 00:40:36.239
hear the newscaster with that loud music, you know that

644
00:40:36.760 --> 00:40:39.559
loud news type of music and the new and the

645
00:40:39.599 --> 00:40:43.000
news anchor is saying breaking news, breaking news for every

646
00:40:43.000 --> 00:40:45.960
little thing. I mean, they could even be saying that

647
00:40:46.159 --> 00:40:49.320
breaking news. There's a litter of puppies that are out

648
00:40:49.360 --> 00:40:53.519
loose or something. But as soon as they have that

649
00:40:53.679 --> 00:40:56.480
music and the breaking news and you feel that anxiety,

650
00:40:57.119 --> 00:41:01.239
chances are you're an empass where things like that that

651
00:41:01.280 --> 00:41:06.039
are that from the outside are impacting your energy field,

652
00:41:06.119 --> 00:41:09.199
and then it affects you that even when you walk away,

653
00:41:09.599 --> 00:41:13.400
you're still kind of carrying that energy with you. Also,

654
00:41:14.000 --> 00:41:18.119
it's when something happens to someone, even on TV. Let's

655
00:41:18.159 --> 00:41:23.239
say someone is bleeding out and someone falls down or

656
00:41:23.280 --> 00:41:25.840
gets cut, and the first thing you do is you

657
00:41:25.920 --> 00:41:28.480
go and grab that part of your own body, you know,

658
00:41:28.599 --> 00:41:30.760
like you go, oh, you know, you just do that

659
00:41:30.880 --> 00:41:35.159
on your own body, or you cringe at something that's

660
00:41:35.199 --> 00:41:38.599
happening to someone else, You're actually feeling it in your

661
00:41:38.639 --> 00:41:43.920
own body. You're physical, so it's a very tangible, tactile thing.

662
00:41:44.599 --> 00:41:47.800
So an EmPATH when this is described to them, they're like,

663
00:41:47.920 --> 00:41:49.039
oh my god, that's me.

664
00:41:49.480 --> 00:41:52.920
Yeah, okay, So I imagine that feels like it could

665
00:41:52.960 --> 00:41:56.320
be very heavy could really weigh people down, particularly if

666
00:41:56.320 --> 00:41:59.400
they're not aware of it. And I know in your

667
00:41:59.400 --> 00:42:02.159
book that you written this book pretty much especially for

668
00:42:02.199 --> 00:42:05.079
these people, right, not just the empaths, but anybody who

669
00:42:05.119 --> 00:42:06.440
is sensitive or intuitive.

670
00:42:07.000 --> 00:42:08.599
So what are the upsides?

671
00:42:09.159 --> 00:42:12.239
What are the upsides picking up on everybody's energy?

672
00:42:13.239 --> 00:42:16.360
So the upside is, so I'm going to say this

673
00:42:16.559 --> 00:42:19.840
for the empaths. What I would want empaths to know

674
00:42:20.480 --> 00:42:23.960
is that the reason you're this way is because actually

675
00:42:24.159 --> 00:42:30.079
your energy is tremendously strong. It's way stronger. Your energy

676
00:42:30.119 --> 00:42:35.239
field is bigger than everybody else's energy field, which is

677
00:42:35.360 --> 00:42:39.480
why you can feel everybody else's energy. The reason you

678
00:42:39.559 --> 00:42:43.599
struggle is because we live in a world that is

679
00:42:43.639 --> 00:42:49.440
not necessarily ready for people with energy. Feels like that

680
00:42:50.000 --> 00:42:53.800
because empaths feel pain very easily, They feel the hurt

681
00:42:53.800 --> 00:42:58.239
of other people very easily. Empaths, by nature are very

682
00:42:58.280 --> 00:43:01.400
gentle on the planet and very gentle on other people,

683
00:43:01.480 --> 00:43:05.760
because they feel if they impose pain on someone, they

684
00:43:05.800 --> 00:43:09.679
feel it themselves, so they don't and so the world

685
00:43:10.079 --> 00:43:14.239
needs more empaths. And so this is why I wrote

686
00:43:14.239 --> 00:43:18.199
this book. I wrote this book because I believe that

687
00:43:18.280 --> 00:43:23.039
there are not enough empaths in leadership positions. And there's

688
00:43:23.079 --> 00:43:25.880
a reason why there's not enough empaths in leadership positions

689
00:43:25.920 --> 00:43:29.280
because empaths find it too painful to be out there.

690
00:43:30.000 --> 00:43:33.800
But I personally feel that empaths are the human two

691
00:43:33.840 --> 00:43:38.519
point zero, and that if we had more empaths out there,

692
00:43:39.159 --> 00:43:41.400
we would have a very different world and a very

693
00:43:41.480 --> 00:43:46.119
different paradigm. We would have a very different reality. And

694
00:43:46.239 --> 00:43:49.800
so I start with saying that we need to redefine

695
00:43:50.480 --> 00:43:54.559
what the word strength means to us. When somebody is sensitive,

696
00:43:54.599 --> 00:43:58.800
when somebody is too empathic, we actually say that they're weak.

697
00:44:00.119 --> 00:44:02.239
What if we were to reverse it. What if we

698
00:44:02.400 --> 00:44:06.960
realized that whenever we're saying that someone is sensitive, when

699
00:44:07.000 --> 00:44:10.639
we say to our kids, don't be so sensitive. When

700
00:44:10.679 --> 00:44:14.039
we say to young boys, you have to man up, boys,

701
00:44:14.079 --> 00:44:17.800
don't cry, what are we doing. We're beating the sensitivity

702
00:44:17.840 --> 00:44:21.960
out of them. What are we doing We're raising unempathic

703
00:44:22.239 --> 00:44:27.960
children to become more ruthless and competitive. When we say

704
00:44:28.639 --> 00:44:32.599
that sensitivity is a weakness and that you need to

705
00:44:32.639 --> 00:44:36.280
be more ruthless to survive, we are actually saying to

706
00:44:36.400 --> 00:44:40.800
people that people who lack empathy, who lack compassion, who

707
00:44:40.920 --> 00:44:44.400
lack sensitivity are actually the ones who are strong and

708
00:44:44.440 --> 00:44:47.199
who will get ahead and who will survive. This is

709
00:44:47.239 --> 00:44:50.320
the message we're sending out into the world. And then

710
00:44:50.400 --> 00:44:53.760
we wonder why our world is so messed up, and

711
00:44:54.360 --> 00:44:59.239
we need to help people who are compassionate and sensitive

712
00:44:59.679 --> 00:45:03.639
to actually realize that what they have is what our

713
00:45:03.719 --> 00:45:07.920
future needs for our own survival. And therefore it's a

714
00:45:08.039 --> 00:45:11.320
strength and it needs to be encouraged, and it needs

715
00:45:11.360 --> 00:45:13.920
to be preserved, and we need more of it out there.

716
00:45:14.519 --> 00:45:17.559
But also they need to know how to protect themselves

717
00:45:17.800 --> 00:45:22.239
and to set those boundaries and to not be completely

718
00:45:22.320 --> 00:45:24.400
depleted exactly.

719
00:45:24.960 --> 00:45:27.400
And that is why I wrote this book. That's the

720
00:45:27.440 --> 00:45:32.320
inspiration behind it. It's to teach empaths and sensitive people

721
00:45:33.000 --> 00:45:35.920
how to be out there in the world and not

722
00:45:36.159 --> 00:45:40.679
constantly feel deflated, defeated, shamed and all of these things.

723
00:45:40.920 --> 00:45:43.519
Yeah, and I'm conscious of your time, but can we

724
00:45:43.679 --> 00:45:46.119
just wind it back a little bit, because there'll be

725
00:45:46.119 --> 00:45:49.079
some people who relate really strongly to that EmPATH thing,

726
00:45:49.119 --> 00:45:51.760
and there'll be other people going, Okay, you've lost me, now, Anna,

727
00:45:51.800 --> 00:45:55.039
you've lost me cast like this is all a bit

728
00:45:55.079 --> 00:45:58.039
out there for me. But each and every one of

729
00:45:58.119 --> 00:46:00.000
us to go back to what we were talking about before,

730
00:46:00.119 --> 00:46:04.000
or has that sixth sense we all have if you

731
00:46:04.039 --> 00:46:07.320
consider it to be like a longer spectrum. We all

732
00:46:07.360 --> 00:46:11.199
have a level of sensitivity. We all have different capacities

733
00:46:11.199 --> 00:46:14.039
to or different levels of access. I guess to that

734
00:46:14.239 --> 00:46:18.199
intuitive knowing, and I think we could every single person

735
00:46:18.239 --> 00:46:22.920
could benefit from having more access and more trust in

736
00:46:23.159 --> 00:46:28.559
our intuitive knowing. And I hear people all the time say,

737
00:46:29.039 --> 00:46:31.960
how do I tell the difference between when I'm trying

738
00:46:31.960 --> 00:46:34.159
to be more intuitive when I'm trying to trust myself

739
00:46:34.199 --> 00:46:37.280
and be authentic? How do I tell the difference between

740
00:46:37.320 --> 00:46:43.280
my inner voice and fear? Like, how do I discern

741
00:46:43.480 --> 00:46:47.199
intuition and like anxiety? If I'm having an alarm bell,

742
00:46:47.679 --> 00:46:50.639
is that just fear or is that actually like an

743
00:46:50.679 --> 00:46:52.960
intuitive knowing that this is dangerous? Have you got an

744
00:46:52.960 --> 00:46:54.760
answer for that, a need or something that you use

745
00:46:54.840 --> 00:46:57.159
to make that distinction.

746
00:46:56.760 --> 00:46:59.840
For yourself in a way you've answered it. If it's

747
00:47:00.519 --> 00:47:05.280
it's not your intuition, your intuition never gives you fear

748
00:47:05.320 --> 00:47:11.000
and anxiety. Your intuition always gives you a way out

749
00:47:11.079 --> 00:47:17.159
of fear and anxiety. Your mind or external circumstances gives

750
00:47:17.159 --> 00:47:21.880
you fear and anxiety, but your intuition will always help

751
00:47:21.960 --> 00:47:24.920
you find a way out of it. So the thing

752
00:47:25.000 --> 00:47:29.920
to do is always follow what feels really good, what

753
00:47:30.039 --> 00:47:35.079
feels positive. The minute a message that comes in says, oh, no,

754
00:47:35.280 --> 00:47:38.719
that's just your mind playing tricks on you, that message

755
00:47:38.760 --> 00:47:41.480
is your mind playing tricks on you. That message that, oh,

756
00:47:41.519 --> 00:47:43.800
it's just your mind, that's the one that's your mind.

757
00:47:44.400 --> 00:47:49.280
Or if you get a really positive, inspiring insight and

758
00:47:49.360 --> 00:47:54.679
then you get this message that goes you're just wishful thinking,

759
00:47:55.039 --> 00:47:58.119
that again is your mind playing tricks on you. So

760
00:47:59.039 --> 00:48:02.679
even if you are about to face danger, if you're

761
00:48:02.719 --> 00:48:07.519
about to face danger, your intuition doesn't give you a

762
00:48:07.599 --> 00:48:12.800
scary message that makes you feel anxious that danger is ahead.

763
00:48:13.559 --> 00:48:16.639
The way it does it is that it gives you

764
00:48:16.840 --> 00:48:19.400
a way to navigate that danger in a way. So,

765
00:48:19.480 --> 00:48:23.320
for example, if you're about to if you're about to

766
00:48:23.559 --> 00:48:27.159
run into another a car or a truck, your intuition

767
00:48:27.280 --> 00:48:30.079
isn't going to say that you're about to run into

768
00:48:30.079 --> 00:48:32.480
a truck, No, because that's going to make you fear.

769
00:48:33.079 --> 00:48:36.840
Your intuition will say stop right now, and so you'll stop,

770
00:48:37.199 --> 00:48:39.880
and then you'll see, Oh my god, my intuition helped

771
00:48:39.920 --> 00:48:44.440
me from running into that truck. Yeah, so your intuition

772
00:48:44.760 --> 00:48:48.440
never gives you messages that increase your anxiety and fear.

773
00:48:49.039 --> 00:48:51.320
It gives you messages that decrease it.

774
00:48:52.000 --> 00:48:56.239
Many years ago, probably early two thousands, I did a

775
00:48:56.360 --> 00:48:58.280
two year course. I don't know if my listeners have

776
00:48:58.320 --> 00:49:01.159
ever heard me say this before, two year course in

777
00:49:01.199 --> 00:49:05.519
what was called a Diploma of Applied Parapsychology.

778
00:49:05.639 --> 00:49:08.159
It was essentially all the woo woo. It was the.

779
00:49:08.480 --> 00:49:11.599
Reading and the energy clearing and the white light and

780
00:49:12.000 --> 00:49:14.320
I and over that two years, I mean, I just

781
00:49:14.599 --> 00:49:20.239
loved it. I really my intuition really expanded. So I

782
00:49:20.280 --> 00:49:23.000
say that for anybody listening that it is even if

783
00:49:23.039 --> 00:49:25.280
you think you're not one of those people. We all

784
00:49:25.320 --> 00:49:29.760
have the capacity, I believe, to expand our own intuitive sense.

785
00:49:29.840 --> 00:49:34.159
And I had some really woo woo experiences like I

786
00:49:34.239 --> 00:49:37.519
had some really just well you call it down.

787
00:49:37.559 --> 00:49:39.159
I know a lot of people call it downloads.

788
00:49:39.199 --> 00:49:44.039
It's just knowings, like just it's like information just planted

789
00:49:44.159 --> 00:49:47.480
in my consciousness from out of I don't even know where.

790
00:49:48.079 --> 00:49:51.039
So I like to share with people that everybody, and

791
00:49:51.079 --> 00:49:53.239
I'm a psychologist, and I follow the science and everything

792
00:49:53.280 --> 00:49:55.360
I do is evidence based in terms of therapy. But

793
00:49:55.440 --> 00:49:57.679
I think we all need to be open to the

794
00:49:57.719 --> 00:50:01.079
idea that there is some stuff that science is catching

795
00:50:01.199 --> 00:50:03.199
up with, and maybe science hasn't caught up with, but

796
00:50:03.239 --> 00:50:06.360
there is there's a balance here. I had this conversation

797
00:50:06.400 --> 00:50:09.559
with Martha Beck too. There is a space in my

798
00:50:09.719 --> 00:50:14.639
life for both the spirituality and the science and what

799
00:50:15.280 --> 00:50:18.320
is proven and what is perhaps not yet proven. So

800
00:50:18.920 --> 00:50:22.480
I spend time every day meditating and with the white

801
00:50:22.519 --> 00:50:24.519
light and with the charcoal balancing.

802
00:50:24.519 --> 00:50:25.519
It's just a habit for me.

803
00:50:26.199 --> 00:50:30.280
Now do you have I guess practices in your own

804
00:50:30.320 --> 00:50:35.519
life and need that you use to enhance your own intuition?

805
00:50:36.000 --> 00:50:38.039
So there's a there's a lot of things that I

806
00:50:38.119 --> 00:50:41.639
do every day. One of the things I do is

807
00:50:41.719 --> 00:50:45.000
I love journaling. And the reason I love journaling is

808
00:50:45.039 --> 00:50:48.599
because it helps me to It actually helps me to

809
00:50:48.679 --> 00:50:54.320
improve my intuition a lot, like a lot, and because

810
00:50:54.840 --> 00:50:59.000
when you when you actually while I'm journaling, it feels

811
00:50:59.079 --> 00:51:02.880
like I'm getting down loads. So it's a really good

812
00:51:02.880 --> 00:51:07.039
exercise for me. And then whenever I have any synchronicities happen,

813
00:51:07.159 --> 00:51:10.440
I will immediately write about it, journal about it, because

814
00:51:10.480 --> 00:51:13.679
the more that you are aware it's happening, the more

815
00:51:13.719 --> 00:51:17.199
you notice things, the more you kind of are aware that, oh,

816
00:51:17.239 --> 00:51:19.760
this happened, and this happened, and this happened, the more

817
00:51:19.800 --> 00:51:23.039
you open yourself up for more and more to happen.

818
00:51:23.440 --> 00:51:27.280
And so my near death experience happened fifteen years ago,

819
00:51:27.360 --> 00:51:30.400
and it blew me wide open so that you would

820
00:51:30.440 --> 00:51:32.679
think that, oh, so why do I need to do it?

821
00:51:33.039 --> 00:51:35.760
The reason I do it is because I don't want

822
00:51:35.840 --> 00:51:41.840
to lose it. Because this physical world is extremely persistent.

823
00:51:42.480 --> 00:51:45.440
Because I'm in the public eye, i talk about it,

824
00:51:45.480 --> 00:51:48.320
and whenever I talk about it, of course I'm going

825
00:51:48.360 --> 00:51:52.119
to get naysayers and debunkers and people like that. And

826
00:51:52.199 --> 00:51:55.159
because this world is so persistent, and when you get

827
00:51:55.280 --> 00:51:58.960
naysayers and debunkers, sometimes it feels like they're trying to

828
00:51:59.039 --> 00:52:03.159
convince you that what you're saying is not true, or

829
00:52:03.159 --> 00:52:05.480
they're almost trying to take that gift away from you.

830
00:52:05.920 --> 00:52:09.960
So I never want to fall into that or lose

831
00:52:11.480 --> 00:52:15.840
my own connection, which I made fifteen years ago, and

832
00:52:15.920 --> 00:52:18.760
so I do a lot of things to stay in

833
00:52:18.800 --> 00:52:22.880
that space. So journaling is one of them. The other

834
00:52:22.920 --> 00:52:25.039
thing I do is I often do what I call

835
00:52:25.079 --> 00:52:29.280
a grounding exercise, where I do visualization where I visualize

836
00:52:29.280 --> 00:52:33.480
myself connected to the universe and connected to Mother Earth.

837
00:52:33.639 --> 00:52:36.639
So there's this light going all the way down, coming

838
00:52:36.639 --> 00:52:40.559
through me and down into the earth. And this grounding

839
00:52:40.599 --> 00:52:44.519
exercise is really important for me because we have to

840
00:52:44.639 --> 00:52:48.400
realize that even though we are spiritual beings or physical beings,

841
00:52:48.960 --> 00:52:54.639
that technically, those of us that are into this spirituality,

842
00:52:55.440 --> 00:52:57.880
we actually have one foot on each side. And I

843
00:52:57.920 --> 00:53:02.039
always tell this to people. They always have to remember

844
00:53:02.159 --> 00:53:05.679
that I have one foot on each side. The people

845
00:53:05.719 --> 00:53:09.440
that struggle the most are the ones that have either

846
00:53:09.599 --> 00:53:15.519
both feet in the spiritual where they are totally like

847
00:53:15.559 --> 00:53:18.199
they cut themselves off from the world and they feel

848
00:53:18.239 --> 00:53:21.880
that they need to be totally spiritual. And so what

849
00:53:22.000 --> 00:53:26.199
happens is they feel that, oh, I shouldn't be earning money.

850
00:53:26.239 --> 00:53:29.840
I shouldn't because money is not spiritual. And so what

851
00:53:29.880 --> 00:53:31.840
they end up doing is they end up not being

852
00:53:31.840 --> 00:53:35.119
able to pay the rent. And also people like that

853
00:53:35.159 --> 00:53:37.719
they are unable to hold down a job because they're

854
00:53:37.760 --> 00:53:41.519
not structured enough because they think they're a spiritual being.

855
00:53:41.599 --> 00:53:46.800
And so if people come here renouncing this world and

856
00:53:46.880 --> 00:53:50.719
thinking they have to renounce all earthly things to be spiritual.

857
00:53:51.159 --> 00:53:55.360
They're missing the point of being here. But at the

858
00:53:55.480 --> 00:53:59.480
same time, if people are here only stuck in the

859
00:53:59.559 --> 00:54:05.519
physical without realizing you're also a spiritual being, you struggle

860
00:54:05.639 --> 00:54:08.920
because you start to fear things that are physical, and

861
00:54:08.960 --> 00:54:12.480
you've cut off your connection to your higher self and

862
00:54:12.519 --> 00:54:16.760
your intuition and to the other side. So my biggest

863
00:54:16.800 --> 00:54:23.239
practice every day is this exercise of connecting up above

864
00:54:23.400 --> 00:54:27.440
and connecting below, so that every day it reminds me

865
00:54:27.760 --> 00:54:31.719
that I am a spiritual being but having a physical experience.

866
00:54:32.400 --> 00:54:34.239
I love that I do a similar thing.

867
00:54:34.360 --> 00:54:37.880
So I love hearing that and I totally agree, like

868
00:54:37.960 --> 00:54:40.920
you can be considered yourself to be a very spiritual person.

869
00:54:40.920 --> 00:54:45.079
But our work here is to be done on the material,

870
00:54:45.079 --> 00:54:47.480
on the physical level. We're here for as long as

871
00:54:47.480 --> 00:54:51.440
we're here to work in a material world using whatever

872
00:54:51.840 --> 00:54:55.400
gifts we have available to us. Thank you for the

873
00:54:55.440 --> 00:54:57.599
work that you do. I know that this is going

874
00:54:57.679 --> 00:55:00.840
to be really resonate strongly with a lot of listeners. Anita,

875
00:55:01.239 --> 00:55:03.480
the book is the latest book? Is Sensitive is the

876
00:55:03.519 --> 00:55:06.119
new strong? You have two others dying to be me

877
00:55:06.360 --> 00:55:10.639
which I just obviously loved. And what's the second one?

878
00:55:10.679 --> 00:55:11.320
There was another one?

879
00:55:11.400 --> 00:55:13.760
It's called what if this is Heaven? This is?

880
00:55:14.440 --> 00:55:17.599
They are all available? And how else can people get

881
00:55:17.639 --> 00:55:19.360
in touch with you? We'll put it in our show notes?

882
00:55:19.360 --> 00:55:20.760
But where can they look you up online?

883
00:55:20.800 --> 00:55:21.159
Anita?

884
00:55:21.920 --> 00:55:24.159
Oh, thank you? So they can look me up at

885
00:55:24.159 --> 00:55:28.920
my website Anitamurjani dot com. I also have what I

886
00:55:29.000 --> 00:55:32.239
call a sanctuary where, which is like a platform, like

887
00:55:32.280 --> 00:55:36.400
a membership platform for like minded people to come together

888
00:55:36.519 --> 00:55:39.280
and connect where I have all my courses and everything,

889
00:55:39.760 --> 00:55:44.320
and that's called the Anitamurjani Sanctuary dot com.

890
00:55:44.639 --> 00:55:45.199
Amazing.

891
00:55:45.679 --> 00:55:48.400
Thank you so much for your time today. I truly

892
00:55:48.559 --> 00:55:49.239
appreciate it.

893
00:55:50.119 --> 00:55:53.559
Oh, thank you so much. You asked some really great questions,

894
00:55:53.599 --> 00:55:54.239
So thank you.

895
00:55:57.360 --> 00:55:59.519
If you are interested to find out more about Anita's

896
00:55:59.559 --> 00:56:02.760
story or in joining her online community, you can check

897
00:56:02.800 --> 00:56:06.880
it all out at her website Anitamojanni dot com. That's

898
00:56:06.960 --> 00:56:12.880
a n T A M R ja ni dot com.

899
00:56:13.159 --> 00:56:15.559
Her books are available in all good bookstores. You can

900
00:56:15.599 --> 00:56:18.880
follow her on social media. Her Instagram is at Anita

901
00:56:18.920 --> 00:56:23.880
Moore Johnny. Her Facebook is Anita dotmore Johnny. As always,

902
00:56:23.960 --> 00:56:26.239
please come and hang out with me on social media.

903
00:56:26.719 --> 00:56:30.880
I'm mostly on Instagram Cast Done underscore xo, or on

904
00:56:30.920 --> 00:56:35.639
Facebook cast Done dot xo, and my website is castone

905
00:56:35.719 --> 00:56:36.440
dot com.

906
00:56:36.960 --> 00:56:37.960
My big news is.

907
00:56:37.960 --> 00:56:40.639
That all three of my Crappy to Happy books are

908
00:56:40.719 --> 00:56:45.840
now available as audiobooks exclusively on Audible. You can download

909
00:56:45.880 --> 00:56:48.239
them for free with a thirty day free trial, or

910
00:56:48.280 --> 00:56:50.519
if you're an Audible member, go and add them to

911
00:56:50.559 --> 00:56:53.639
your cart right now. If you would prefer a paperbook

912
00:56:53.679 --> 00:56:56.800
and signed by me, you can order those from my website,

913
00:56:56.960 --> 00:56:58.920
or of course you can find them in any bookstore.

914
00:56:59.400 --> 00:57:01.960
I cannot wait to catch you in the next episode

915
00:57:02.079 --> 00:57:12.199
of Crappy to Happy Listener