Owning your truth with Layne Beachley

0:02 A listener production. Hi, you're listening to Crappy to Happy. I'm your host, Cas Dunn. I'm a clinical and coaching psychologist, a mindfulness meditation teacher, and author of the Crappy to Happy books. In this series, we talk about all the things that might be making you feel crappy, and she had tools and tips to help you overcome them. In each episode, I chat with interesting, inspiring, intelligent people who are experts in their field. And my hope is that you take something away from these conversations that helps you feel a little bit. Less crappy and more happy. Today, I am thrilled to bring you a conversation with Ozzie. Surfing legend Lane Beachley Blaine has achieved extraordinary and groundbreaking success in her chosen sport, amassing a total of eight world championship titles. She's also been a force for positive change in the world with her charities and ambassador positions, allowing her to channel her boundless energy into a variety of causes that deeply matter to her in both her personal and professional life. Lane's journey hasn't been without its challenges.

1:11 She's learned firsthand what it is to be motivated from a place of fear and the downsides of that kind of motivation and success. Fortunately, she's also learned a lot of lessons along the way about how to reconnect with love and joy as a source of motivation, the power of vulnerability, and the importance of asking for help. Today, Lane is generously sharing some of those lessons for our benefit, and if you're interested to learn more from Lane about how to awaken your own truth and take inspired action in your life, She's offering a sneaky discount on her online program, which I will share with you at the end of the show. Justa heads up that towards the end of this episode there is a brief reference to sexual assault, so please be mindful if that's a topic that might cause you distress. Let's hear from Lane. I mean, let's just start with a bit of your background. You are I surfing legend in this country and around the world.

2:07 You are six consecutive world titles. The only surfer male or female. To have won six consecutive world titles. Went back in one of seventh and I didn't realize until recently went back again just a couple of years ago and won the World Masters championships. So I guess my first question for our listeners is where do you find that motivation? What motivates you to push yourself to those levels of success. That's a very good question, and it comes down to my intrinsic motivation. You know. I don't do it for external validation or to win more awards and more trophies, even though that's a great result and a byproduct of it.

2:49 But I do it whole highly. Because I want to do it and because I'm willing to do the work to generate the results I expect of myself. And I love to challenge myself. I love to step outside of my comfort zone, and I expand on my comfort zone by doing things that make me uncomfortable. Yeah. Well that's a really interesting answer. I was going to ask you, is this something that you feel like you were born with? Like, is this something that is intrinsic to you or is it something that you have learned or developed over time. Definitely something I've learned and developed over time. I mean I was probably born with a fighting. Spirit, or maybe I even developed that when. I was in the humidic group for six weeks fighting for my life off because I was a premature baby, and I feel that that's probably where my fighting spirit emanated from. However, I was able to channel that into becoming a world champion surfer and use it to my advantage.

3:38 The reason I retired from the pro tour was because I didn't really want to do the work anymore. Like I wasn't willing to do the training, and I wasn't willing to deal with the expectations and all of the stuff that comes with being a professional athlete. I just wasn't ready to step up and continue to do that. So that's why I walked away. However, to win the Masters World Championship, it was just something that seemed like a bit of fun and an opportunity to catch out with all my friends and peers and. See a part of the world I've never been to. And I must have only put maybe three days of training into that. Yeah, but then I have a trophy room full of a reminder of what I've endured and how I've succeeded. And you know, experience is a wonderful platform to resort back to and rely on in times when you really need it.

4:23 I find that really interesting when you say I have a trophy room. Do you mean so I have all of this evidence that I can do this. I've got this and I don't need to stress myself about this. Yes, yes, we have a trophy room, and it's a pool room. There's a pool table in there, and there's just well there's trophies everywhere, and then there's framed records in excess records all around as well. So there's a lot of memorability in this room. But yes, that sounds like a great room. It's a great room. And there's a bar, a very well equipped bar, an allowance. Yes, it's all about balance, a lot of shot glasses, and it's a wonderful environment to walk into. I often say that if I'm ever having a self pity party, for one, I walk into that environment and just go, you know what, I've done pretty good. I've lived a great life and I've had some amazing experiences, and it's a reminder of all the things that I have achieved, because it's just as easy to block out all the crappy stuff as it is to remember all the happy stuff, and that for me going in there, it's a reminder of both, but of the results I can produce when I really put my heart and soul into something and dedicate myself to achieving something.

5:28 Whenever I talk to people like you who have achieved success at such a high level, I always want to ask you, know, we all have these self doubts and fears and I'm not good enough, and there's always somebody to compare ourselves to, somebody who's doing better. I'm always interested to know do you or have you experienced those kinds of fears and self doubts, and then how do you turn that around and overcome them? Absolutely, and I still experience those fears and self doubts. I reflect back on different periods of my career and think about when I first joined the pro Tour. I felt immediately inadequate. And unprofessional because I looked at the fitness and the health of my peers and my counterparts, and I thought, wow, I'm never going to measure up to that. So that comparison immediately led to a sense of inadequacy. And so I've noticed over my life that the one thing that makes me doubt myself is comparison. If I'm comparing myself to somebody else, I'm comparing myself to a future version of myself or a historical version of myself. I'm not going to be enough in the present moment. And if I'm doing that, it's also a trigger or a I guess triggers the right word here. It's a trigger to me to go, Okay, something's wrong because I'm either when I'm confident and when I feel when I'm centered in myself, I'm not looking outside of myself for validation. I'm very congruent with where I'm at and who i am. I've

6:59 always lived a life according to my values, and except for the times when I've compromised them and made some really big mistakes and. Live to regret them. But ultimately, when I'm very centered and very balanced, then I'm not comparing myself. But the minute that I start to compare myself and then start to feel that sense of inaccuracy, that's a trigger to me go, Okay, something's going wrong here. So you're either worn out, or you're going too hard, or you're not taking care of. Yourself, you're not getting enough sleep. That's the opportunity for me to then put the mirror back on myself and ask myself what's leading to this. Yeah, that's a great level of self awareness to have to be able to notice that, like you say, it's like a queue.

7:41 Yes, that's the word, thank you. To tell yourself that, yeah, I've got to come back and recenter and work out where the problem is so that I can take steps. Yes, I didn't have that sense of self awareness in the early years of my professional career. You know, the first probably seven years of my professional surfing life, I certainly didn't have that level of awareness. So what that turns into is a lay blame game. So therefore it's everyone else's fault, and then. I get and then I've become very fierce and quite driven by my. Rejection issue that was deeply ingrained with me from being an adoptee. So I then behaved in a way that rejected people, or behaved in a way that gave them reason to reject me. Either way, it was fueled around fear and rejection.

8:27 And then it was everyone else's fault. There was the judge's fold and my peers folded, and my equipment's folder was everyone else's fault. And this sucks and I hate this and this is shit, and yeah. I became a little misnegative and didn't have the awareness to take ownership of it at that stage. I'm really glad that you mentioned that, because I was going to ask you about some of those early experiences before. I do though, when you say when you joined the pro surfing circuit, you didn't have that self awareness and you were engaged in a lot of comparison. How old were you when you joined the pro circuit? Eighteen? So quite young, very young, very young. So understandably those are lessons learned with time and experience. It's amazing how bulletproof and knowledgeable you are at eighteen.

9:11 It's a fresh out of high school. I know everything. I hit my thirties and realized I know nothing. My goodness, I got so much to learn. Solene, you had some really difficult early experiences. I wasn't aware of the Humidy crib, but I was aware that you lost your mum at a very early age six when your mom passed away, I was, and then shortly after found out that. You were adopted. Correct. Yes, I think it's fair to say we mostly only realized appreciate the enormity of things like that when we get older. But do you recall how that affected you at that age, how you process that as a child.

9:55 Yeah, I recall how I felt. I didn't I don't really recall how deeply it affects did me at the time. And as you say, when we have the wisdom and the experience to reflect back on that period and you can determine the catalyst that it was. I know when my mom died, it was deeply distressing. It was heartbreaking. I had nightmares. I cried a lot. I know I missed her a lot. But I was also a very independent tomboy that relished with her freedom to go and play and. Experience and fall out of trees and break bones, and that never resulted in a lawsuit. I was able to just go and play and have fun. And so that was my solace as a kid, and it's still to this day is my.

10:35 Solace as an adult as well. You know, when I'm. Feeling distressed or unhappy or sad, or needing to process emotions and fears, the first place I resort to is nature, and either the ocean or the bush. Primarily it's the ocean. Because where I live, so a law of proximity gives me the benefit of the doubt. When my dad told me I was adopted, it. Was a completely different feeling, and that was because I was older and I had the brain waves to then go from being a narcissist. To a victim. So what that looked like is when my mom died, it wasn't my fault. Well, yeah, no, it wasn't my fault, but it was happening to me. But when my dad told me I was adopted, it was my fault. And what that looks like is that he's telling me, you know, I love you and you're my baby girl, and we always wanted you. However you don't. You're not a blood relation.

11:25 And the stories I subscribe to in my own mind where I've been abandoned, rejected, and I'm undeserving of love. So the stories that we tell ourselves then trigger a certain emotional response which then feels a behavioral response which then determines the results or of you know, you become the self fulfilling prophecy of the story that you create. Fortunately, the story I created. Was hang on, if I'm not deserving of love, I have to become a world champion, because then I will be deserving of love. And so then I'd field it into something very self serving, but became a whole lot more than that. I was going to ask you, how did these feelings have abandoned the manner fest and you've just explained that. So obviously some of those experiences can lead to really tragic outcomes.

12:05 People can really. Spiral into a you know, in a negative into a dark place. But you really used it to fuel you to. Achieve, absolutely, and that tends to be a common denominator through people who have had pretty challenging upbringings. You know, they use that as a as a. Platform to then propel them towards success, or they use it as a hook to hang their shit on and just say I'm never going to make it because that's what happened to me as a kid. So it tends to be two very clear, definitive channels or pathways that we choose. I think what's also really typical of people who experience the sense of abandonment. And for you, it was finding out that you're adopted. You know, for other people, there are various issues. Even the death of a parent you know, will lead to abandonment issues, parents with addiction or even.

12:55 From divorce, et cetera. Like, there's lots of ways that this can manifest experience abandonment issues, they often become heavily self reliant and find a challenging to let people in. Well, I guess I'm asking. Is that true for you and. How is that something you had to learn to overcome to be able to. Ask for help? Absolutely, yes, all of that is true for me. I kept everybody at arms distance and I was in control. Trust is a big issue. And I would only let people in when it served me, and so that made it very difficult for me to ask for help. And I am a silent sufferer because there was so much shame wrapped up in being wrong and making mistakes and getting hurt, especially in during myself.

13:45 When I think about the result of that behavior, it made my journey through life a lot more challenging than it needed to be, and it exacerbated the pain and suffering because I would stay stuck in. It for way too long. So, for example, when I had chronic fatigued the second time, I obviously didn't learn the first time, so the second time was way more debilitating, and I had depression. I was in suicidal thoughts with you know, I had a lot of suicidal tendencies. I had to sleep fourteen hours a day. I was just in a really crappy place, and I was a really unhappy, dark, dismal, depressed person, and I still didn't have the courage to ask for help. And it wasn't until one.

14:26 Day I actually got scared about the situation I found myself in and I finally got dissatisfied with the feeling. I believe that dissatisfaction is the precursor to change, and until you get dissatisfied, you're not going to do anything different. So I had. Convinced myself that this is okay somehow, and it wasn't until I actually stopped and recognized how scared I was. I got really scared, I got dissatisfied. And I went, okay, I need to ask for help. Then the next BIGOTS challenge is knowing who to ask and having that netw work around you. After being an. Adoptee with a rejection case and pushing everyone away, there's very few people that I had the courage to call.

15:07 And fortunately a good dear friend of mine called Joanna Griggs, who I knew had been through at least glandular fever, which is the precursor to chronic fatigue. So I knew she'd been through similar experiences. I picked up the phone and rang her and I said, I'm scared, I need help. And her response was what took you so long? Oh? Really? Yeah? Other people see things in ourselves that we sometimes take a little longer to see. Exactly, but you won't do anything about it until you're ready. I think it's really interesting too that, as you say, those feelings of rejection, abandonment, not asking for help, pushing yourself to attain the achievement almost as a form of validation and to.

15:48 Boost yourself worth. That's positively reinforcing when you're winning and you're getting the gold medals, like, there's an upside to that too. There's obviously all of this other downside which you've just described. But for you, are you aware in hindsight that that was partly what kept you from asking for help or what keep for listeners? You know, it's what keeps a lot of people from asking for help, because there's reward to all of that pushing and succeeding and striving. The question you need to ask yourself is, firstly, what's wrapped up. In your success? Is your sense of self worth wrapped up in your success.

16:31 Then secondly, do you believe that success has to be hard? And I was deeply invested in struggle. It's the whole reason. Why I created my academy was to help people detach from fear and shortcut the struggle. Because yes, I'm viewed and regarded as one of the most successful athletes. In the world. However, I want to ensure that people don't do it the way I did it because it cost me a lot. Yes, there's a lot of upside. I've got trophies, and I've got fame, and I've got success, However at what cost. And it cost me my quality of health, a lot of great relationships that. Are never going to be mended. It cost me now I'm in constant pain management because I didn't kind of honor my body. You know, it cost me a lot as well. And it can be done differently if you learn to trust in that. But trust and me really didn't go hand in hand. You know, adoptees and we do not trust it very easily. I mean, in my book, in my biography, the woman who I referred to as my nan who brought me up after Mum died, she said it took her a good eighteen months for me to hold.

17:40 Her hand in public. And I'm six years of age, you know. So, Yeah, I was very strong, willed, stubborn and determined to do it myself, very independent, and just to prove to. The world that I can do this. I can do this on my own. And nobody achieved anything alone, nobody achieved anything great alone. And when I start to write down the list of all the people who have helped me in my life, it's pages long. Yeah, when you picked up the phone and you called Joanna and she said, what took you so long? I'm curious to know what were the first steps then that you took towards healing that and learning to do things differently.

18:26 The first step I took was to forgive myself for putting myself in this situation, because by forgiving myself, I'm also. Taking responsibility for it. And then I. Recognized that it was time to do things differently, and I didn't know what to do, so I asked her for guidance, like who did you see? Or where do I go? And she told me. About a practitioner in Manly, which was nice and close by it to where I was living. And I had to go on a very strict diet yeast free, wheat free, sugar free, dairy free, fruit free, alcohol free diet. Yeah, no red meat, nothing tin can or preserved. Basically it was a very simple guy. There was no gluten free menus back in the nineties. I mean, I was referred to as yuppies.

19:08 Disease, so the community had very little empathy for me. So of course I had very little empathy for myself, so that I'd beat myself up to beat people to the punch. And I was quite hard on myself. So I had to lower my expectations, boost my immune system, nurture myself, surround myself in love and forgiveness, and just ride it out. And I gave. Myself as much time as I needed to get through it, and then surround myself with who I referred to as my honesty bromenas the people who bring the best out in me, people who were honest with me, but people who console me in my defeat, celebrating my successes. But just see the best in me and bring the best out in me.

19:49 And I've heard you say that you won the first six titles from a place of fear, but the seventh, You're in a whole different wa place. So is that the transition where that healing happened. And what was different in that seventh. Well, so I actually won five world titles in a place of fear and two in a place of love, And so that was world title number one and World time number seven. I won in a place of love, and well titled number two to five, I want two to six. I won in fear. The difference for me was, I loved the process. I loved the experience. I loved the learning, I loved the I loved the winning, and I loved the losing. And I losing taught me how to win.

20:31 And I detached from the outcome and just followed the process, and therefore there was a lot more joy in it. And then when I won it, it was effortless. And when I was sitting in the water, I was enjoying the challenge, and I just wholeheardly immersed myself in the whole experience. But from world title number two to six, I became defined by the experience. I became defined by my results. And so therefore the euphoria of success was really high. The depths and darkness and depression of failure was really, really low, and so that it became this roller coaster ride. And that's what I wanted to teach people to avoid riding that roller coaster by taking the time to self define as opposed to being defined or dictated to by external circumstances and results. So when I came back and won the seventh one, I had to do it the same way when I won my first one.

21:21 Because I had to ask myself number two to six. How sustainable was it? It was completely unsustainable. I had reoccurring injuries, I'd lost my sponsors, I had strained relationships. With my peers. You know, it was just hard all the time. But that was validating my subconscious belief that success. Had to be hard. Isn't that interesting? So ask yourself, does success have to be hard? Because I didn't have to look too farther through. To prove it. And so, how have you you've achieved all of this sex? Of six sex? I wish i'd achieved all this sex, but in my twenties and thirties.

22:02 Definitely. Let's start that one from the top. So how have your goals changed? Now? Great question. My goals used to be outcome driven now, they're intrinsically aligned with how I want to feel. So I don't set a goal based on what I want to achieve anymore. I base it on and the same with my decision making framework. It's all based on how I feel and how I want to feel, and so that's. My vision for today. If you think about your values. As a twenty year old or a thirty year old, they evolve as you do as a human being, and so does our vision, and so do our goals for ourselves. So my goals are really wrapped around my standards. What standards do I set for myself as far as my health and my physical wellbeing, my emotional wellbeing, my mental wellbeing? And then how am I better serving the world, How am I bringing more knowledge and experience and wisdom to the world.

22:53 How am I helping people be better versions of themselves? That's where I see it as far as goal setting is concerned. There seems to be the theme with people who are really living their best life that there is this focus on It shifts very much from being all about me, as you say, and achievement and success and outwards to what I can contribute. I guess I'm just opening up for you to talk about all of the ways that you now find joy and pride in service and contribution. Where shall I start, Well, let's start with the first thing is my academy, a Wake Academy, which is a center for self empowerment. And I created a course called Own Your Truth, which is pretty much the forty years of life lessons all wrapped up and condensed into a seven round online course for people to help them wake up and own their shit and trust in love. I want to help people detach from fear, take control of their lives, but design a life they love, versus living one by default, which was what I was doing a lot throughout my professional career and also back in retirement.

24:00 It's amazing, you know, we can learn all these wonderful lessons, but we have to continuously apply them otherwise we waste the opportunity. And I ebb and flow in and out of you know, we all teach what we need to learn. So I know that these. Kind of discussions are really healthy reflection points for me too. Going am I really doing that today? You know, this morning I woke up feeling quite hungover and dusty, and like, okay, I sabotaged myself last night. So today I'm going to nurture myself and do things that make me feel good and making sure that to contribute to the world, I have to contribute to myself first. To inspire people, I have to feel inspired as well. To motivate others, I have to be motivated, so holding myself accountable to then be able to better serve. So that's why I'm really proud of the academy. I love the course material it took me. Basically, COVID was a blessing in disguise for me because it gave me ten months to invest myself wholeheartedly into building this course and recording it and writing it and you know, designing the workbook and recording the videos and yeah. So it's been a real passion project that I really wish to share with the world because I know it's going to positively enhance people's lives. Because as a keynote speaker, which is also another way I contribute to the world, I feel people are wanting more after I leave, you know, I give them more I can in an hour.

25:18 But then this is great follow up work. It's self paced. You can jump online onto awake Academy dot com, dot you and just go through the course at your own pace whenever you feel like it. So, and it's all about awareness of your. Feelings, your stories, your limiting beliefs, your strengths, your loves, your roles that you play in your life, and then aligning yourself with your dream team, aligning yourself with who you truly are, and then awakening your spirit and bringing in more celebration and more play and better health. And yeah, just creating a life that you love around and awakening. You to who you truly are and who you truly want to be. So that's there are two main ways that I contribute today. Yeah, and then there's a great movie coming out soon called Girls Can't Surf, which is like a documentary around women surfing in the eighties and nineties, and it's a fascinating snapshot of the chauvinistic, misogynistic and sexism that we encountered.

26:12 Through those periods. It's a really great film. Lane, going back to your personal story, having been adopted, you did find your mum or she found you when you're in your twenties. How important was that for you to reconnect with her. At the time I didn't think it was that important. Quite honestly, I applied for my birth certificate when I was twenty four, and that really gave me some sort of consolation prize that I went okay. So she was seventeen when I was born. She was living in sorry Surrey Hill's in Sydney. So thank god she gave me up. Otherwise I would have been too far from the beach.

26:53 I may have become a tennis player, but surfing is still my number one passion. And she was. From Scotland, and so I immediately decided that she was a backpacker from Scotland that just got caught up in the wrong crowd and then had to go back to Scotland after she gave birth to me. And it wasn't until she. Found me in nineteen ninety nine, which is I was twenty seven years of age, that she was able to clarify the story. And it was a tenuous relationship because I didn't trust her version of the story and who am I to judge her version of the story? And it was and I realized my judgment of others is what keeps them at arm's length.

27:34 You know, it's my fear because we. Judge what we don't know, and we we judge what we don't understand, and we fear what we don't know. So my judgment of fear just kept everybody at arm's length and kept me in control of when I was going to allow these connections to occur. When I stopped judging my mum's story, I was then able to create a much stronger bond with her. But then at that point she chose to reject me again, So we always had this tenue dance with each other. She was living in America by the time I met her, and she living in Spakane in Washington State, so I'd see it maybe once a year. We'd communicate, you know, four or five times a year, but I would not call it it was I guess it's a long boat to say it was a mother daughter relationship. It was quite a Yeah, it was quite a distant mother daughter relationship. But I finally allowed myself to call her mum, which took a lot, because I'd always equated motherhood with loss.

28:32 I guess I'm curious to know, was there the word that people throw around is closure, and how important was it for you to meet her to find out about, you know, find out the story to close off that unknown for you. Yeah, I think the challenge with adoptees is that the more you know, the more can of worms it opens. So it doesn't really provide cult closure at all. You know, I've since connecting with mum. Yes, it gave me some didn't really give me closure. It just gave me some confidence in understanding about who I am and why I am the way I am, But it certainly didn't close any mystical loops or mysterious loops. And then having no recollection or no connection with my biological father because Mum was raped, so she really didn't want to connect with my biological father and anytime I mentioned it.

29:30 It caused a lot of distress to her. So and then I've had four or five guys come forward claiming to be my father since my story has been released, and I've had three or three or four DNA tests. Yeah, none of them have checked out to be my dad. So how is that for you? It's bizarre. I mean it opens up a whole can at worms as well, So you know, I go through the process because it's just worth exploring. If these guys claim to be my dad. Then I'm willing to be open to the consideration. I'm very pragmatic, you know. I don't get too bogged down in it, Otherwise it can become a little overwhelming. So I just let's just play it out and see what happens. And deep down I get a feeling.

30:13 That, yeah, I don't think this guy's my dad. I think he's just written himself into my story, which has happened a couple of times. So and then I just stopped connecting with you know, I stopped communicating with them immediately. But then Mum died two years ago from a very en cancer at sixty two. And the one closure I did have the wonderful opportunity. To experience is that on her deathbed. So she rang me in my April of twenty eighteen and said, Li've given me three weeks to live, can you come say goodbye? Jumped on a plane the next day, sat on her bedside. I had a bedside vigil and we. Had a five minute conversation where we literally forgave each other for being bitches to each other and not connecting with each other, and said I love you, and then she fell asleep and that was it.

30:59 She never went up again. That for me was the closure that I needed, just to say sorry and thank you and then that's it. And so whenever I whenever I start feeling sad about the lost opportunity or. The lack of connection, or the division that I created, or the pain. That I created or caused, I just go back to that conversation and that reconciles it for me and then I move on. So I feel for people in COVID, you know, who haven't had the opportunity to say goodbye, because that's the closure that you need. And COVID funerals are I experienced one of those very early during COVID. It's a tragic. Oh really, it's just a sad, sad situation to have nobody at a funeral and be watching a live stream with nobody in a room.

31:47 My heart breaks for people. I'm fascinated by the fact that multiple men have lined up to say, oh, yeah, I raped somebody in the seventies. Well, they've all claimed that Mum wasn't raped. They're all claiming that she was Misgierson, that you know, she was not what she claimed to be. So very complex, it's a really complex situation. You said earlier that you have always been a very values driven person. What are your highest values now? Right now? My overarching value is a sense of freedom, but my driving values are vitality, giving back and being real, authenticity, and then support. I have to feel supported for me to have the confidence to do something audacious, such as build an online academy. Like I was in the car driving to the agency that was going to help me build this thing with my business partner, and I was in tears, going, if this is a.

32:54 Struggle, I don't want anything to. Do with it because I don't wish to go through what I went through to win six consecutive all titles like that. It's just not worth it. I mean, it's worth it because it's given me a platform to talk and share my life lessons and ideally shortcut people's struggles and pains. However, it wasn't completely worth it because it was just so painful and it's such a trigger. So now I'm very aware of how much I rely on others to help me navigate my way through life. Yeah, so important. And I've heard you also say that you surf every day, and you mentioned earlier that really looking after yourself is fundamental that's center for you. Apart from surfing every day, what other habits do you have to keep yourself well and healthy?

33:47 I do yin yoga beside my bed every night. I have a yoga mat next to my bed, and I drink a lot of water. I've always got a water bottle in my hand. I do the fast diet two oh wow. And we Kirk. And I schedule those in weeks in advance, so then non negotiable days of Mondays and Thursdays, unless, of course, our schedule somehow sabotages those days. But we you know, last week, last Friday, Turk's like, okay, what fast days we do next week? When we scheduled them in and we're asked out for dinner, sorry it's a fast day, we can't go. So for us, it's really benefited our lives and we've been able to bring it into our lives and become part of our life as opposed to dominating our life.

34:29 And we've been doing it for maybe six and a half years now. Wow, we really like it. But when we got on holiday, it's at seven zero twenty one zero balance balance, Yes, but I. Love it, and you know, it's like I said, I. Woke up feeling hungover this morning, and there's no surf, so I make sure I make the time to at least get in the water, which is where my hester wet. I was having a swim this morning. I prioritize my sleep, you know, I get at least eight, if not nine, hours of sleep. I was injured for for two months after falling down the stairs here at my office and wasn't able to surf and wasn't able to exercise, and I got dissatisfied after about six weeks. I went, surely, there's got to be something I can do.

35:09 So I created like this six minute workout that I can do every day. So that's the oga MAT is. Therefore in the morning for my six minute workout. Because it's six minutes, no need to skip it. I can fit that in anytime and it just makes me feel better. I don't eat I don't eat dairy products. I haven't eaten red meat for over twenty years. I maintain eating as much organic and seasonal produce as I possibly can. So I just prioritize and nurture myself. But also I allow myself to fall off the rails and my husband's looking at bringing out a rose. So we had to do some. Rose testing and there was five bottles that we had to get through yesterday, but fortually drink more. I mean we tasted them all. Yes, Hey, if you open up five bottles of wine, you've got drink at least one of them.

35:52 I'm fascinated by that, the five two and how I'd love to know what the benefits of that are that you have directly experienced. Yeah, so at first, I mean I did it for weight management. I don't really like to lose too much weight because I'm happy with how my body is. But it helps me maintain my weight, so if I and it also prevents me from eating foods. That aren't a part of my regular diet without guilt. Because I love hot chips. I can't deny myself a hot chip, and so I just I have guilty pleasures and without the guilt, which what I really. Love about the five two. It's helped me maintain my weight.

36:32 It's helped me maintain all my vitals, you know, so my blood pressure, my cholesterol, my blood sugars, it gives my digestive and immune and digestive immune and endocrine systems all the break on the days because today's a fast day, so I have a smoothie in the morning, and then we have a three out of four hundred calorie dinner. I wake up a lot more. I'm actually a lot more mentally clear. I function and think a lot clearer. Yes, I have about I have an energy crashed at around two or three, but then I just blocked that time out for a nap and just drink a lot of water, so I wake up more hydrated and a lot more refreshed on the next day.

37:14 So I've just I've seen that there's a lot of benefits. And then Kirk when it. Had his blood tests. He's really good with his health because he's had cancer, so he's really good at monitoring his health. So after he gets blood tests every six months, and the last test was just a glowing report of his health. His liver function, his kidney function, his heart, he's cholesterols, his blood shugars. Everything was just perfect and they keep getting better as he's getting older. It's amazing. So it works for us, so we live by My last. Question, Lane is how do you now define success? I've defined success by living a life. I love that doesn't mean you're always going to be doing things you love, and it doesn't mean life's all good and everything's amazing all the time. To me, it means having the choice to do what I want to do when I want to do it. However, it's primarily driven or determined by how I want to feel, and every day, I want to feel energized. I want to feel healthy, I want to feel happy. I want to feel like I'm contributing.

38:21 I want to I love to learn, so I want to feel like I'm growing, and if I'm doing that consistently, then I'm living a very successful life. I'm so grateful for your time today, Lane, and I will make sure that we put a link to your Awake Academy in the show notes for this episode, because I'm sure a lot of people will be keen to go and check that out. Thank you so much for your time. You're welcome, Thanks so much, kas have a lovely days. What a fantastic model of courage and resilience. Lane is as promised. If you're interested in learning more about Lane's Awake Academy, head to Awake academy dot com dot I you and use the code Awake ten to take ten percent of her online program. As always, if you enjoyed the episode, please do leave a rating and review. Send me a message over on Instagram I'm at cast Done underscore XO, or send an email to hello at castdone dot com. To be part of the online community for Crappy to Happy, jump on into my free Facebook group.

39:20 It's called Crappy to Happy Community and I'll put the link in the show notes. If you're ready to take your happiness to the next level, you're also welcome to join my paid membership called Beyond Happy. You can find out all the details cast done dot com forward slash beyond. I look forward to chatting to you in the next episode of Crappy to Happy. Crappy to Happy is presented by cast Don, produced by Davis Vilenski, Audio production by Darcy Thompson. Listener